I wish only that I had a baby to give.

[constance]

Angelina Jolie Coming for Your Baby

MALIBU, CA—Angelina Jolie has filed for adoption of your newborn baby, sources close to the actress reported Tuesday. "Angelina loves your baby, and you should be honored that she has chosen it," said publicist Jacqueline Silver, citing the growing collection of babies Jolie has culled from families worldwide. "Color, creed, whether your child is wanted—none of it matters. Angelina has fallen in love, and through legal means or force, your baby will soon be hers." Immediately after acquiring your child, Jolie will dress it in Betsey Johnson infant wear, give it a faux-hawk, name it after a random passage from the The Tibetan Book Of The Dead, then resume her relentless search for babies.

Comments

[violetisblue.livejournal.com]

Damn, now I have to get pregnant so she can adopt my baby. Like I don't have enough to do already!

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Yeah, sorry about that. But, you know, Angelina just wants to make sure that your baby is happy and safe. She has everyone's best interests at heart.

[somniesperus.livejournal.com]

I have no babies, but I can offer her my own undersized superego.

[tofty.livejournal.com]

I think she has quite enough of that to be getting on with. Look how beautifully selfless she is, taking on the responsibility of your baby--if you had one, I mean--like that!

[miraminx.livejournal.com]

Do you read "Boondocks"?

1 (http://www.ucomics.com/boondocks/2005/08/15/)

2 (http://www.ucomics.com/boondocks/2005/08/16/)

last (http://www.ucomics.com/boondocks/2005/08/17/)

*rudely invades your personal space*

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahahahaahahahaha!

Thanks! I poke around the books in bookstores, but I'm definitely not current. Have you seen Birth of a Nation?

Re: *rudely invades your personal space*

[miraminx.livejournal.com]

Isn't Boondocks great? I was hoping you hadn't seen them so I could be pleased at having shown those to you, if that makes any sense at all.

The DW Griffith movie? No, actually, I haven't.

Re: *rudely invades your personal space*

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahaa, no! Man, you must have thought that was the most random, out-of-nowhere question of all time.

Nah, the Birth of a Nation I was asking about is the graphic novel (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1400083168/qid=1124671561/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_xs_ap_i1_xgl14/102-4210457-2282550?v=glance&s=books&n=507846) by McGruder and others, about what happens when East St. Louis secedes from the US. It's uneven, but really kind of brilliant.
And yes, Boondocks is hilarious. I do so love those kids.