Has it really been more than a week?
Dec. 31st, 2006 09:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
constanceI'm meant to be at a New Year's Eve party right now. I'm meant to be getting drunk and singing karaoke with a bunch of people I don't know (and a few I do), and possibly to be spending the night at my hosts' house if I've drunk too much to drive home.
I'm not, though. I spent all weekend wishing desperately for a cold, a flood, a fire, anything to get me out of this particular obligation to which I should never have half-heartedly, conditionally agreed in the first place, and then decided at the eleventh hour, sparkly skirt and marabou-trimmed sweater all laid out on the bed, that I just wasn't going to make myself do it. I wasn't going to sit miserably in a corner for four hours wishing I was home. So I called my hosts and left a message on their machine using bad weather as a perfectly lame excuse, and here I am.
And I've been feeling guilty ever since, despite the fact that I doubt my absence will be remarked. But the truth is that of all varieties of party that connect with my life, my absolute least favorite is the New Year's Eve party, and I've decided that I am past feeling that I somehow should be forcing myself to try and enjoy something that most people enjoy without effort.
Next year I may spend the night with friends, if there are such around who like a quiet sort of NYE. Or I will spend it alone. But one thing I will not do is agree to go to a loud, unruly party just because I can't think of a good reason to say no. I owe it to myself and my hosts not to be so loserish as that; and I'm not a resolution-making sort, for the most part, but there it is, my resolution for the year 2007.
I'm off now to have a long, be-pruning, hot-water-twice-replenished gingerbread-scented bath, and then possibly a late-night movie. Anyone who wants to join me -- for the movie, not the bath -- is more than welcome. The key's under the mat; come right in!
And to everyone a most happy New Year's Eve, spent in the way that delights you most.
I'm not, though. I spent all weekend wishing desperately for a cold, a flood, a fire, anything to get me out of this particular obligation to which I should never have half-heartedly, conditionally agreed in the first place, and then decided at the eleventh hour, sparkly skirt and marabou-trimmed sweater all laid out on the bed, that I just wasn't going to make myself do it. I wasn't going to sit miserably in a corner for four hours wishing I was home. So I called my hosts and left a message on their machine using bad weather as a perfectly lame excuse, and here I am.
And I've been feeling guilty ever since, despite the fact that I doubt my absence will be remarked. But the truth is that of all varieties of party that connect with my life, my absolute least favorite is the New Year's Eve party, and I've decided that I am past feeling that I somehow should be forcing myself to try and enjoy something that most people enjoy without effort.
Next year I may spend the night with friends, if there are such around who like a quiet sort of NYE. Or I will spend it alone. But one thing I will not do is agree to go to a loud, unruly party just because I can't think of a good reason to say no. I owe it to myself and my hosts not to be so loserish as that; and I'm not a resolution-making sort, for the most part, but there it is, my resolution for the year 2007.
I'm off now to have a long, be-pruning, hot-water-twice-replenished gingerbread-scented bath, and then possibly a late-night movie. Anyone who wants to join me -- for the movie, not the bath -- is more than welcome. The key's under the mat; come right in!
And to everyone a most happy New Year's Eve, spent in the way that delights you most.
no subject
Date: 2007-01-03 08:50 pm (UTC)By the way, I love your new hipster-girl haircut!
(Pee Ess I have presents for you too which I have not sent because I too seem to be avoiding the post office.)