constance: (*pippa's-song-ing*)
[personal profile] constance
My heart is racing tonight. Literally, I mean -- I feel dizzy and choky with it. And it's happened before, but usually only for a minute or two at a time, my heart pounds and then it stops pounding and my body remembers what it feels like when my heartbeat is normal, and I can't remember that awful constricted panicky feeling any more, until the next time it happens. Tonight, though, it's been racing for about three hours so far, and the tips of my fingers are feeling tired as I type this.

:::

It's the weekend before the first anniversary of Katrina, a little before the first anniversary of Rita. I spent the weekend, that part I was not toiling away on my little retail planet, obsessively looking over websites, learning how much the landscape, the economic profile, the heart of South Louisiana has changed during that time. Reminding myself what it's like there now.

I was talking to a friend on the phone recently, about going back to New Orleans for the Phoenix Rising con, and she asked me if I was ready to go back and see everything in person, if a social occasion was the right time to take it all in; she knows me well enough to know that I need time to process things -- especially upsetting things -- on my own before taking them up with others. I told her that I was ready. I thought I was. But looking at the stories this weekend, in The Times-Picayune and the Times -- and everywhere else, too -- I don't know, any more, and even the thought of not being able to take a taxi and eat at Dooky Chase (you couldn't-used-to drive there, man, couldn't-used-to walk there), well.

This has been a stressful weekend. Maybe that's why my heart is racing.

:::

Also, after two months of radio silence, I have two job interviews next week. Wish me luck!

Date: 2006-08-28 04:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gmth.livejournal.com
Ooh, good luck with the interviews! And I hope your heart rate settles soon. That happens to me once in a while, and I hate it. It pounds so hard sometimes my whole body shakes. Blech.

Date: 2006-08-28 05:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aubrem.livejournal.com
I don't like this racing heart thing. Have you had it checked out?

One way to get rid of it is to squat down and put your thumb in your mouth and blow as hard as you can. Yes, you use the same muscles as on the toilet but it works. : /

An even more effective method is the throw a bag of frozen vegetables on your face (gently but quickly, all at once - as though jumping into icy water). This almost always works.

I think most arrhythmias are harmless but it's best to get these things checked, no?

Date: 2006-08-28 05:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aubrem.livejournal.com
I said to Tofty:

I don't like this racing heart thing. Have you had it checked out?

One way to get rid of it is to squat down and put your thumb in your mouth and blow as hard as you can. Yes, you use the same muscles as on the toilet but it works. : /

An even more effective method is the throw a bag of frozen vegetables on your face (gently but quickly, all at once - as though jumping into icy water). This almost always works.

I think most arrhythmias are harmless but it's best to get these things checked, no?

Date: 2006-08-28 05:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gmth.livejournal.com
I did, actually. When I was pregnant it was especially bad, and I wore a halter monitor for 24 hours once. I forget what the results were, to be honest, which means whatever they found wasn't a big problem.

Date: 2006-08-28 05:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aubrem.livejournal.com
oh good. : ) Sorry to be intrusive like that.

Date: 2006-08-28 05:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gmth.livejournal.com
I take it as a compliment. :-)

Date: 2006-08-28 05:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aubrem.livejournal.com
It absolutely is.


: )

Date: 2006-08-28 12:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
Thanks! My heart did slow down to normal speed again, late last night, and I'm feeling much better this morning. :D

Date: 2006-08-28 12:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
After last night, I'm perfectly willing to speak to a doctor about it (the rare brief spells I was having before never seemed like such a big deal to me), although I think I pretty much know what he'll tell me: get more exercise! Eat healthier! The thing is that I don't have insurance right now, so this talk will have to wait until I have a proper job.

I didn't know about the thumbs, or the frozen veggies -- I'll try those things if this ever happens again!

Date: 2006-08-28 01:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] laurelwood.livejournal.com
although I think I pretty much know what he'll tell me: get more exercise! Eat healthier!

You know, it's been my experience that doctors tend to not take heart-related concerns very seriously from women under 40. I went in a few years ago with complaints of chest pain, and was told that it was probably due to "the strain of carrying around such a big bust". !!!

I will worry until this either goes away or you can get it checked. (I totally hear you about waiting till there's some insurance, though- oy.) In the meantime, I like the sound of [livejournal.com profile] aubrem's tips- they sound like they'd be very effective.

Date: 2006-08-28 01:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] laurelwood.livejournal.com
Oh- and knock 'em dead at those interviews! Yay for interviews!

Date: 2006-08-28 02:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] somniesperus.livejournal.com
You have gotten good advice re: the heart thing, so let me just send hugs and whatnot for everything else. :-*

Date: 2006-08-28 03:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dahlia-777.livejournal.com
That's great news about the interviews. Good luck!

And about the NO visit, I doubt you'll know how you're going to deal with it until you get there. So at some point you're just going to have to go. If that makes sense.

Date: 2006-08-28 06:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] leestone.livejournal.com
Luck, my Darling Dearest.

I have been thinking about you all week and must call soon.

Date: 2006-08-28 06:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
Thanks! They are a necessary evil, and I know it, but I can't help but wish they were already over. Interviews are pretty much not my strong suit.

Date: 2006-08-28 06:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
*puts on kickboxing helmet for your benefit*

Well, you tell your doctor from me that before he dismisses your concerns as the overconcerns of the busty, I have a close friend whose mother had a heart attack at 32. I mean, yes, it's rare, but not so rare that you can dismiss all complaints out of hand.

Also, it's true that I don't have much experience with heart troubles, but his "diagnosis" is puzzling me. Were you supposed to be stressed by your breasts? Or were they supposed be giving you genuine trouble?

Date: 2006-08-28 07:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
*hugs*

Date: 2006-08-28 07:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
Oh, I think so too. It's just really a question of when and how, not so much whether it'll ever happen.

Thank you for the good vibes, man. They'll come in handy.

Date: 2006-08-28 07:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tofty.livejournal.com
:* Sounds good! I miss your voice -- and I've got a spiffing new phone (and more importantly, a cheaper, better plan which allows me to talk any time I want!) with which to talk to you.

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