*currently supplementing diet with nice pear*

[constance]

When last I left you, I was on my way to heat up a plate of pasta for dinner, and I did so and began to eat it and somehow lost hold of the plate and spilled about half of it onto my lap. I was sort of slimy and dripping with Healthy Choice pepper cream sauce. And so I very patiently scraped it off me and into the trash, wiped myself down and changed my pj bottoms, threw the spilt part away and sat down to finish eating my rapidly cooling--not to mention diminishing--dinner.

And then I did it again.

And this is why I will always be better than you.