GUESS WHAT HAS NOW TAKEN TOP PLACE ON THE LIST OF ACCIDENTS I WANT NEVER EVER TO EXPERIENCE EVER.

A conversation:

R: Hey, Cammy, C was over at my house this weekend and he had a little accident, and when we went to the emergency room, he misunderstood me and claimed it as Workers Comp when it's going to be taken care of by my homeowner's insurance. I wanted to bring you a copy of the paperwork in case anyone had any questions or problems sorting things out.

Me: Okay, I'll hang on to it. How's C? Is he all right?

R: Yeah, he should be fine -- we got him to the hospital and they took care of him pretty fast.

C: What happened, if you don't mind my asking?

R: Well, I sort of nicked him with my chainsaw.

Me: WHAT?!

R: We were cutting down a tree and the tree was falling toward him and I grabbed him to get him out of the way...

Me: OH MY GOD. You cut him with a chainsaw??

R: It was an accident. He's going to be okay.

Me: OH MY GOD.