Night sweats

Tonight I woke up from a dream. It was so real, Grandma dead, Mom incoherent and drunk, sandwiches and simmering resentment and grief so strong that it woke me right up, that it wiped that good mood I'd been coasting on tonight right out. It is 2:30. I don't know when I will get back to sleep. I don't know when it gets easier. It doesn't get easier.

And I know no one likes the sad girl, and the angry girl just makes people fight back. But I wish right now that there were someone I could call and talk to. I don't want someone to solve my problems for me. That's not what I need. I just need someone to listen, or not even listen. Just sit on the other side of the phone, there, making sure I don't have to get through the night alone if I don't want to.