By the way, I just rock the house right down.

Have you ever had one of those mornings where you wake up with a
terrible headache and feel as though you've regressed back to the days
when you used to wake up with hangovers? When there's no possible way
you could be hung over? I feel that way this morning.

However, that's not the reason why I am making this, my momentous first
e-mail post. The reason why I am making this, my momentous first e-mail
post, is to make an announcement:

I, CAMMY, HAVE FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER FINISHED A NYT SUNDAY CROSSWORD
PUZZLE WITHOUT CHEATING, WITHOUT LEAVING EVEN A SINGLE SQUARE BLANK,
AND WITHOUT FILLING IN ANY SQUARES THAT I WASN'T QUITE SURE ABOUT BUT
I WAS SO CLOSE TO FINISHING I COULDN'T BEAR TO LEAVE BLANK SQUARES.
BY MYSELF. IN PEN. WITH NO SCRATCHOUTS.

Perhaps you may not think this is big news. Perhaps, as it relates to
the Cosmic Plan, it is not. But you have to understand that I have
been doing the things for years, years I tell you, on a weekly basis.
And every week without fail I get to a certain point and I start
slowing down, and sometimes I sneak online to google some answers and
kick-start the process, and for a while, when we both still lived in
New Orleans, I would do them together with my friend H and we would
sit across from each other at the Cafe Rue De La Course and furiously
scribble out the words, calling them out as we got them (and oh my god
I know this sounds lame but this is a nearly perfect way to spend a
Sunday morning, giggling over cups of tea and cinnamon rolls and
playing crossword puzzle the way kids play the card game Battle,
slapping down the words with an air of gleeful triumph). I make
educated guesses and sometimes, at the very end, I wildly fill in
those last few blanks because I am just compulsive enough to make the
sight of a crossword puzzle with four squares blank pretty much
unbearable.

But this week's puzzle was a stroll along the sunny banks, I tell you.
Most answers came effortlessly, and the ones that didn't became
obvious as other squares were filled in, and I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF I
CAN HARDLY STAND IT SO I AM HERE TO BE SMUG AT YOU.

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Actually, I suppose it is possible that I have a hangover from my
dance of triumph, performed at 1 a.m. with cats scattering and a dog
staring on in bewilderment.