constance | (21) having a sanctuary (Reply)

My god, it's been a crappy day. I had work to last about twelve hours, and managed to finish about half of it; I spent an hour of time I could have spent doing the aforementioned work on the phone dealing with my boss's personal finances; I fucked up in a big and horrifying way which had me tracking down an employee and his wife and making abject but ultimately unhelpful apologies to each of them; I had three errands to run once I got off work, one of them a shopping trip, which I can't stand doing lately because every time I swipe my debit card anymore I remember that I haven't had a raise in two years and during that time it's become substantially more expensive to live.

I brought some of that work I didn't finish today home with me to work on, but it's not gonna happen tonight, and here's why: as soon as I walked through the door tonight, my bad day eased up. Just being at home does that for me. Just walking through the door makes me feel better able to cope. And with each passing minute, as I changed into my flannel pajama bottoms and hopelessly mismatched tee, as I fed and cuddled and apologized to the dogs for not having the time to walk them, as I ate my very healthy dinner of toasted pecans (hey, I have like thirty pounds to get through! I'll be eating pecans at every meal for the next year or so!) I unwound a little more, and there's no way I'm willfully winding myself back up tonight.

The work's not getting done, which means that I'll end up getting up and going in an hour or two early tomorrow, but that seems a small price to pay for a quiet night tonight.