The hard, hard life of the misunderstood artist

[constance]

I meant to put up my Christmas tree this weekend, got the ornaments out, decided what furniture was going to go where to make room for it, and then on a whim I decided to make my first couple of Christmas cards instead, along with the photo-card I'm planning on sending my RL friends and relations. And now it's two days and a perfectly insane number of manhours later, and I have those cards done, but I'm gonna have to step up my schedule somehow, because otherwise there will be no Christmas tree at all this year, and also my Christmas cards will be going out somewhere around May 1 of 2008.

I mean, not to reveal any Card Spoilers to you lot, but here are some things I've learned in my efforts:

• Just because that goddamned holiday paper pack that cost way too much money has an entire page of clip-art alphanumeric to play with, it does not therefore follow that the letters and numbers will consistently match each other.



• I should have started training the dog to sit quietly on the fireplace hearth with a sign hanging around his neck, like, months ago; if I had, we might have prevented nervous breakdowns on both sides. (On the other hand, we might not. Saturday was a tough day.) We got there in the end, though.



• No matter how hard you wish for them to, no matter how many different ways on how many different configurations you try to print them, photos do not print well on regular cardstock.



• Because paper scraps increase at a rate approximately equal to the Fibonnacci number progression with each card I complete, I predict that by the end of the holiday season, I will be ded from paper drownding. I'll miss you all; I just want to say that while I still can.

Comments

[djin7.livejournal.com]

/random


That Fibonnacci thing cracked me up. *giggles*

[tofty.livejournal.com]

*takes a bow from behind 75,025 paper scraps*

[laurelwood.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, I can relate to the drowning in paper fate. (Even if I tried and failed to understand the Fibonacci principle. It's hell living with only half a brain.) There was that one art project I did with those elementary school kids that involved creating mosaic-type pictures with little scraps of paper, and I swear, the classroom would be like an OCEAN by the time we were finished.

I can also relate to Holiday Photos with Children and/or Dog. Phoebe is bad enough, but when the girls were 5 and 2, I took them out back and used two whole rolls of film trying to get just one picture I could send to distant in-lawish relations who wanted to see "Denny's chillun". EVERY SINGLE ONE came out horribly, so since my family was local enough to know that the girls weren't really that ugly/stupid-looking, I sent the wretched snaps out to them instead, complete with rude captions.

I'm dying to see what you came up with for the photo. I'll bet it's good, despite the wrangling/angst. And receiving your card is always the pinnacle of the Holiday Mail Season for me.

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Reading your stories of Christmas photo fiascos just makes me glad we live in an age of digital cameras, because I must've taken a total of about 50 pictures to get ONE that wasn't blurred, a shot of Leory's butt, or tilted at a weird angle because I was trying to hold a treat enticingly in one hand, carrot-on-a-stick style, and shoot with the other, while kneeling about four feet away because I couldn't get any farther before Leory started trying to scoot closer.

I'll be glad to share the image with you! I don't have it here at work, but I'll upload it when I get home tonight.

[tofty.livejournal.com]

It's still tilted, and he's farther away from the hearth than I'd like, but CLOSE ENOUGH.

[laurelwood.livejournal.com]

Oh my goodness, that is the best picture ever. Isn't he a handsome, well-cared-for boy! He looks like he's lived the cosseted, lap-of-luxury life since the very beginning.

That's going to make an excellent card. Your RL list is lucky indeed. I like Leory's distance from the hearth, too, because I can see all of the cool Victorian details.

Thanks for showing me!

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Well! Thanks for looking! He is very handsome, isn't he? I am very proud of him. Now if only I could get him to not try to kill anyone who comes within 10 feet of me.

[lindyhoppr.livejournal.com]

I have a friend who photoshops good pictures of her children onto a good picture of her and her husband in front of the tree. She says it is so much easier than trying to get the whole family to quit wiggling for a second.

[lindyhoppr.livejournal.com]

PS. your doggie is gorgeous.

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Well, I think so too! :D

[tofty.livejournal.com]

Man, if I'd thought of that on Saturday!