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every little thing just tears you apart.
If I'm going to have badly broken year, the thing that breaks it for me is summer. I don't know why it is, but bad things tend to happen to me in summer, so that in addition to the usual crankiness over the heat, I often have actual, legitimate reasons to be unhappy; but the heat doesn't exactly make me more amenable to any upheavals, I will at least admit that.
This summer seems to have started early: the last month has been spectacularly bad, work-wise. Ten layoffs in a month, ten people to sit down with, explain what we're doing and why we're doing it and how it all works. And then I get to deal with the fallout, the paperwork and the changes in policy, the hard feelings (although strangely -- or not at all strangely -- it turns out that I find it a little easier to deal with the angry men than the ones who are all understanding), the questions that come after.
If nothing else, this month has been a learning experience for me. It doesn't get any easier, from an emotional standpoint; my father was wrong about that, and in a way, I'm glad for it. But I'm much more fluent, now, in the languages of COBRA and DOL, can answer questions much more readily, am no longer flying by the seat of my pants policy-wise, and since I don't like cringing through my days certain that one forgotten step will lead the entire company into a maelstrom of destruction heretofore seen only in the pages of certain apocalyptic comics series, that is something of a relief.
It doesn't mean that I'm not glad to see the end of the month, though. It doesn't mean that I'm not looking forward to my upcoming vacation with a feverish intensity I haven't felt since I was working for the Devil in New Orleans. It doesn't mean that I don't feel, very strongly, that my early-onset Bad Summer ought now to end early as well.
:::
There are other things happening right now, after hours, when life is not actually going all that badly, but I'll save those things for later, and for now just point out that my weekend, which had been sort of booked up with a biggish project, is now wide open, and it's looking awfully fine from here. (Thanks for that, universe.) I hope yours is, too.
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This summer seems to have started early: the last month has been spectacularly bad, work-wise. Ten layoffs in a month, ten people to sit down with, explain what we're doing and why we're doing it and how it all works. And then I get to deal with the fallout, the paperwork and the changes in policy, the hard feelings (although strangely -- or not at all strangely -- it turns out that I find it a little easier to deal with the angry men than the ones who are all understanding), the questions that come after.
If nothing else, this month has been a learning experience for me. It doesn't get any easier, from an emotional standpoint; my father was wrong about that, and in a way, I'm glad for it. But I'm much more fluent, now, in the languages of COBRA and DOL, can answer questions much more readily, am no longer flying by the seat of my pants policy-wise, and since I don't like cringing through my days certain that one forgotten step will lead the entire company into a maelstrom of destruction heretofore seen only in the pages of certain apocalyptic comics series, that is something of a relief.
It doesn't mean that I'm not glad to see the end of the month, though. It doesn't mean that I'm not looking forward to my upcoming vacation with a feverish intensity I haven't felt since I was working for the Devil in New Orleans. It doesn't mean that I don't feel, very strongly, that my early-onset Bad Summer ought now to end early as well.
:::
There are other things happening right now, after hours, when life is not actually going all that badly, but I'll save those things for later, and for now just point out that my weekend, which had been sort of booked up with a biggish project, is now wide open, and it's looking awfully fine from here. (Thanks for that, universe.) I hope yours is, too.
Leave a Livejournal comment